Relationships are fragile and not just about the happy side. Many times, couples face differences, misunderstandings and other factors that lead to conflicts. If we start to feel that our relationship is unhappy, it’s important to come to an understanding and support each other before it gets to the point where both parties lose their feelings for each other and decide to end the relationship. But before things go too far, let’s see how relationships can be restored and love can endure.
What are the indications that a relationship is starting to have problems?
• Living unhappy together and being stressed to the point of uncomfortable when together
• The relationship is more like housemates than lovers
• Feeling that you are more important than the other
• Conflicts using harsh tones and words that hurt each other's feelings
• Feeling like you have to stay for the children’s sake only
• Unable to find solutions to problems that occur
• Feeling that separation is the only way out
Tips to improve relationship
• Talk and listen – Communication is key to a healthy relationship. Talking and listening to each other on a daily basis are little things that nourish each other's hearts so they can’t be ignored. When a misunderstanding occurs, communicating your thoughts honestly and calmly will help both parties get to know and understand each other's perspectives better.
• Keep adding sweetness to your relationship – When stay together for a long time, the burdens of duties may diminish the sweetness. Keep finding activities just the two of you can do such as taking trips or dining out. Teasing each other to make them smile and giggle and complimenting each other will also add happiness to the relationship.
• Respect each other – No one is more important than another in a relationship. Respecting and accepting the identity and decisions of the other half and being honest with each other are important ingredients that keep relationships strong.
• Allow personal space – Relationships don’t mean that you have to do everything together all the time. Give your partner the opportunity to spend personal time both inside and outside of home on a regular basis. This will allow both of you to maintain your identity without feeling the need to force yourselves to change too much.
• Adjust goals to live together – Each person has his/her own dreams and goals. However, when deciding to live together, sharing life goals is a top priority for team building. It is also essential to share duties to achieve the same goals.
• Manage money matters – Many relationships break up because of financial problems. Therefore, openly talking over financial issues and helping each other maintain fiscal discipline is absolutely essential.
• Be open-minded about sex – Sexuality is another key element in the foundation of a relationship. Discussing your sexual orientation and views openly is something all couples should do.
Couples therapy can help heal relationships
Sometimes talk between lovers involves delicate issues, especially when reconciliation efforts are being made. Each party looks at the issue from their own point of view only. They don’t see the problem the way the other party does or understand their feelings and thoughts. Couples therapy can help reconcile the two parties. As an intermediary, a psychotherapist sees the relationship from the outside without getting personally involved. First meetings with psychotherapists usually involve just asking questions that illuminate the dynamics of the relationship. It’s common to delve into family background and look at the individuals’ pasts as a way of finding the causes of relationship difficulties. As discussions progress, the focus moves onto planning how to restore the strength of the relationship.
Having a problem in a relationship doesn’t mean separation is the only answer. Facing each other and working together to overcome obstacles helps strengthen relationships. Keep in mind that lasting love often comes from the little comforts and joys with which you fill each other’s heart day by day.
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